The Greatest Rap Freestyle Ever


Slob On My Knob“, what I consider to be the greatest rap freestyle of all time, was a track on the 1999 album “CrazyNDaLazDayz” by the Tear Da Club Up Thugs (TDCUT). TDCUT was a group on Hypnotize Minds Records that consisted of Three Six Mafia and most other rappers on the record label. TDCUT is considered to be the violent, primal side of the Hypnotize Minds label. I believe, without a doubt, that Slob on My Knob is the greatest rap freestyle of all time. A statement of the most primal of male urges. Here’s another Tear Da Club Up Thugs joint feat. the Hot Boys!

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Three 6 Mafia in the 90s

Three 6 Mafia of the 90s was one of the forefathers of hardcore rap. The group consists of DJ Paul, Juicy J, and Crunchy Black. Their most famous songs include “Sippin’ on Some Syrup”, “Poppin’ My Collar”, and “Doe Boy Fresh”. Furthermore, they won the Academy Award in 2006 for Best Original Song for “It’s Hard Out Here For A Pimp” from the film “Hustle and Flow”.

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Band-Aid On Da Chin

It’s clear that the Three 6 Mafia have been very successful, but I consider their greatest achievement to be the greatest freestyle of all time “Slob on My Knob”. It’s a fast tempo, 2:00 long song. It contains many “genius” one liners. Let’s look at a few of them.

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Another Epic Three 6 Mafia Joint

Immediately, we are hit with the iconic voice of Juicy J saying “Slob on My Knob/Like Corn On the Cob.” It’s pretty clear here, the man wants a BJ, in a manner similar to a girl eating corn on the cob. Puts a pretty clear picture in your mind. A woman chomping on a bloody wiener.

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Corn Fed Midwestern Girls

Another outstanding lyric is “Third Find a Bag/To Hide the Ho Face”. What this means is that, if you’re an uggo you can still hook up with him, you just have to hide your face in a bag. I couldn’t imagine me telling a hunny to put a bag over her head, and her not leaving. Takes a true pimp to pull this one off.

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The Royal Penis Is Clean Your Highness

Moving on to verse two, almost immediately we’re hit with “I Said Just Forget It It’s too Crabby”. Apparently he’s not happy with the lady his boy hooked him up, because she has crabs. This is the definition of Too Much Information, but entertaining nonetheless.

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TDCUT

Last but not least, we have the line “Till I Got Caught, Fuckin With Her Mother”. Always with the drama. Our boy Juicy must have been screwing his girls mom. I can’t imagine the scene this caused. To any Three 6 Mafia fan, you can see the foreshadowing this line had on Juicy’s future songs, which frequently reference MILFs.

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Only 90s Kids Will Get This

Here’s a link to the Crazyndalazdayz full mixtape.

Here’s Smoked Out.

And here is the Classic Slob on My Knob.

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Please leave comments and thoughts!

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Don’t Fucks Wit Us!

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